Today Quotes
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The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Dan Quayle may or may not make.Dan Quayle
Now is the time for all good men to come to.Walt Kelly, "Pogo" (comic strip)
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.Dorothy Parker
Arithmetic is being able to count up to twenty without taking off your shoes.Mickey Mouse
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.R. D. Laing
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.Woody Allen
The Army has carried the American ... ideal to its logical conclusion. Not only do they prohibit discrimination on the grounds of race, creed and color, but also on ability.Tom Lehrer
Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.Russell Baker
Spare no expense to save money on this one.Samuel Goldwyn
On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.Will Rogers