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The strongest of all warriors are these two -- Time and Patience.

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Old age is the most unexpected of things that can happen to a man.

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If there is one basic element in our Constitution, it is civilian control of the military.

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Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.

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God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board

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I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

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Sacred cows make the best hamburger.

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How come we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

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If a person offend you and you are in doubt as to whether it was intentional or not, do not resort to extreme measures. Simply watch your chance and hit him with a brick.

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We are just tenants on this world. We have just been given a new lease, and a warning from the landlord.

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