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Hypocrisy is the homage which vice pays to virtue.

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I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist.

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Change is good, but dollars are better.

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I am a friend of the working man, and I would rather be his friend, than be one.

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I am a part of all I have read.

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I am an agnostic; I do not pretend to know what many ignorant men are sure of.

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I am as bad as the worst, but, thank God, I am as good as the best.

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I am in the prime of senility.

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I am not a saint, unless you think of a saint as a sinner who keeps on trying.

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I avow myself the partisan of truth alone.

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