Today jokes
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Q. How do men define a "50/50" relationship? A. We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.
Q. How do men exercise on the beach? A. By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
Q. How does a man show he's planning for the future? A. He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
Q. What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant? A. Any place without a drive-up window.
Q. What do you call a handcuffed man? A. Trustworthy.
Q. What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner? A. A power failure.
Q. What should you give a man who has everything? A. A woman to show him how to work it.
Q. What do you instantly know about a well-dressed man? A. His wife is good at picking out clothes.
Q. What's a man's idea of honestly in a relationship? A. Telling you his real name.
Q. What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups? A. Put the remote control between his toes.