Today jokes
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I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."
What do hookers do on their night off: type?
A man went into a store to buy some condoms. "That's 1 dollar 15 plus tax," said the store assistant. "I don't need tacks," said the man. "It'll stay up all by itself."
Q: What is a four-letter word that ends in 'k' and means the same as intercourse? A: Talk
Q: What can you find in a man's pants that is about six inches long, has a head on it, and that women love so much that they often blow it? A: a $20 bill
Q: What is hard, six inches long, has two nuts, and can make a girl fat? A: Almond Joy candy bar
Q: What is it that all men have one of; it's longer on some men than on others; the Pope doesn't use his; and a man gives it to his wife after they're married? A: surname
Did u know that a condom had a serial number? No, I never had to unroll one that far.
Q . what did the sign on the whore house say?A: Beat it we are closed
This women had a magic morror from which anything you wanted you got,so one day she stood in front of the mirror and said I wish i had bigger breasts and it happened so then she ran down stairs to show her husband he was so amazed that he ran up stairs and stood infront of the mirror and said i wish my dick could touch the floor and his legs fell off !