New jokes
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Question: What goes up and never comes down? Answer: Up
Q: What did the cook say to the dough? A: I "NEED" you!
What do you call a tube with a degree? A graduated cylinder.
Why did the boxer date the pretty girl? Because she was a knockout!
What did one rock pool say to the other rock pool? Show me your mussels.
Where did the fortune-teller go on her vacation? To Palm Beach.
Q: Why don't you wear snow boots? A: Because they'll melt.
Q: Why did the Mummy go to the bathroom? A: To wrap itself in toilet paper!
Q. Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? A. He didn't have the guts too
Which painter always had a very bad cold? Vincent Van Cough